HANSCOM AIR FORCE BASE, Mass. -- The Department of the Air Force promotes a Spectrum of Resilience to help develop tangible and intangible strengths in Airmen.
A strong Airman shows great courage and fortitude while supporting peers through an outward-facing culture of service before self.
The model highlights five key areas that support both individuals and communities: clinical/medical health, support entities, peer/social, family and friends, and self.
At the crossroads of these pillars stands Master Sgt. Lamar James Valentina, 313th Recruiting Squadron, enlisted accessions flight chief. His story of perseverance and service exemplifies what it means to be a resilient Airman.
Long before beginning his Air Force career, Valentina faced personal challenges. His father left before he was born, his mother struggled with substance addiction, and he moved often, including foster and group homes, by the age of 15.
“Growing up, I felt a lot of anger," Valentina said in a previous interview with Public Affairs at Aviano Air Force Base in Italy. "I felt unwanted by my mom and father, although I never met him.”
Valentina eventually found belonging in the Air Force. Friends, peers and mentors had a profound impact on him.
“I love the phrase, ‘It takes a village to raise a child.’ It took a whole village of people to get me where I am today,” Valentina said in 2014. “That’s been the same thing throughout my experience in the military, no matter where or who it is, the military family treats me with kindness.”
Today, that “village” is more important than ever.
In 2019, he was diagnosed with lung cancer. Several months later, doctors re-diagnosed it as Stage 4 renal medullary carcinoma, a rare kidney cancer.
“When I received the diagnosis, I was like a deer in the headlights,” he said. “It’s like how they portray it in the movies. Everything just goes into tunnel vision.”
Though many had already seen Valentina as “a walking example of resilience,” this new challenge was uncharted territory.
"It’s difficult in times like that. You want to be tough for those around you; you don’t want to rely on too many people,” he said. “But you need to have trust in others. Your support system, your team, they are what’s going to get you through this.”
Valentina’s support system has grown over time. He credits his physician at Dana-Farber Cancer Institute, Dr. Bradley McGregor, along with mentors, best friends, his ex-wife, his son, and others, for playing vital roles during his recovery.
“There is no way I would have gotten through my cancer diagnosis without my village,” he said. “They all supported me with laughs, tears and hugs.”
Valentina was given a prognosis of 12 to 18 months. Stage 4 cancer, the most advanced stage, means the disease has spread to other parts of the body. But rather than slow down, he doubled down on his purpose.
“Perspective is huge,” said Valentina. “If you can be someone who knows value and looks at things and sees the brighter side – that’s something people should often think about.”
When diagnosed, he was only 30 credits away from attaining his degree, Valentina thought, “Is this how I want things to end?”
He spoke with his then-commander, Lt. Col. Kimberly Barr, and together they developed a plan to finish his degree. Valentina used tuition assistance to make it happen.
Arizona State University stood out as the best option, not only because of its proximity to Luke Air Force Base, his first duty station, but also because it was the alma mater of former NFL player and U.S. Army Ranger Pat Tillman.
“He [Tillman] was a guy who had millions of dollars, yet he opted to join the military where he died serving his country,” said Valentina. “His story really resonates with me.”
He earned his Bachelor of Arts in Organizational Leadership from ASU and is now pursuing a master’s in global leadership and management from ASU’s Thunderbird School of Global Management.
“I’ll finish my final class on Aug. 12 of this year and graduate with my master’s degree in December,” Valentina added.
Beyond education, Valentina has stepped into the public eye as a speaker, become a certified Air Force resiliency trainer, and mentored and advocated for Airmen.
He sometimes reflects on far he has come, and what that looks like to others.
“I’m very proud of my accomplishments. Sometimes, I’m talking to my troops or my 17-year-old son about working hard or getting straight A’s,” said Valentina. “It’s not a competition, but if I can push through cancer, school, parenting and the uniform – all at once – then I promise you, you can overcome your obstacles, too.”
Now, nearly six years after his diagnosis, Valentina is defying the odds. He visits Dana-Farber every three months for routine scans.
“At the end of the day, I’m just a kid from Brooklyn who refused to quit,” he added. “My scars tell a story of survival, but more than that, of growth, of faith, and of impact. I don’t just live with cancer, I rise through it. I fight for the next chapter, for my son, for my Airmen, for those still in the fight. My story isn’t about cancer, it’s about legacy.”